White Girl Problems.

Holy shit.
The amount of insecurities a teenage girl can possibly have growing up.
Life fucking sucks as a teenager.
At least it did for me.
If everyone had someone there for them to tell them to stop whining, go play outside and just be happy to be alive, life would have been so much easier.
None of the things I used to worry about matter; at all.
NONE OF IT.

At most it's been 5 years since the darkest days, and it's been long enough to see progress.
Always trying to impress people we don't like.
Always putting yourself down because of any physical "imperfections" you think you have. If you can look at every single aspect to who you are, and love yourself for who you are, then that's all you'll ever need.

No one will ever have your back more than you, and when it's time to dance, you're the best partner you'll ever need! They know all the steps! (: (hahah, get it. because it's you... anyways.)

I understand darkness, and what it's like to resent every single aspect of who you are.
But I also understand sunlight, and what it's like to become aware and connected with every single individual cell that is your entire existence.

I also understand that every other single person is their own individual cluster of cells that is their entire existence. And that's just it! We're all made of the exact same shit. Some of us look a bit different, but know what else is different? Snowflakes! Boom. Not a single one alike.

Let go of attachment.
Let go of all of the self defeating self talk.
Try breathing for once.
(this is more of a peptalk for myself right now, but you can breathe with me.)

I write these things down as I think them because I'm still struggling with it. It's not as easy as it is to write it.

I don't know how to relax. Even know, I keep holding my breath and my shoulders keep locking up, or something. Just supa tense or sumthin duuuuuude.

/:

Hanging out with just yourself can get kinda strange. I talk of how all you need is yourself, and yes, I do actually believe that, but have you ever realized how weird you really are?
kelp.